Best Intentions

A while back a friend of mine asked me why I wasn't blogging. She reminded me that if I would just make it a habit to find the same time every week to blog, it would become a habit and I could remain on task. Sounded like a great and doable idea to me. I assured myself that every Friday after the radio show...I would make it a priority to head home from the station and compose my latest martini manuscript. Well it sounded simple enough, but alas I am not that disciplined. But I am going to attempt to learn to be.
There has been so much that has occurred since my last blogging...I have enjoyed the company of my yaya's during a recent trip to Toronto for a CSP conference, and I have continued to welcome some absolutely amazing guests to share time with me on the radio show. College football season is back in full swing ( and my beloved team is undefeated so far) and my youngest son is off to a great start of the school year despite the fact that he started to school with a broken arm. Life is good! It's crazy busy...but good none the less.
I have taken note recently of all the unexpected, but wonderful opportunities that have presented themselves. I am almost to the point of being overwhelmed by them all. But I remain humbled by them. I have found that my journey is still a winding path with curves and turns that I never prepared for. I have also found that my expectations are continuing to change. Lately I find myself wanting to completely re-do my home. I have come to a point where I want to wipe the slate clear of unnecessary items and objects. I want to live in a cleaner, clutter free environment. I mentioned this to my hair dresser the other day who's life closely resembles mine. Our children are all about the same age, our husband's work in the same field and she and I own our own businesses. We are always amazed by how much we find we have in common during one of our long chats over a cut or straightening...you can learn a lot about another human being over chemicals and 4 1/2 hour hair processes! ha! Then it occurred to me...we live in our homes at times in the way we want to be living in our lives. I am to an age now where I want to be open to all kinds of new adventures. I want to be free of clutter not just in my home, but in my life. My husband finds this change in my decorating taste highly unusual for me...but I can so see the relationship between how my surroundings have reflected who I was at each stage of my life and how my desire now to change my environment is so reflective of my wanting to change other things. My hair dresser made the point that she wants to start new and fresh and only have those things in her decor that are purposeful and of meaning...That is exactly what I am wanting...and not just in my "accoutrements", as my husband calls them...but in my life. I want to be doing things that are more purposeful and meaningful for me. Many of our early years are spent doing things because we had to...not necessarily because we wanted to. There are always going to be obligations and expectations...but I need to learn to find more time for doing those things I want to do as easily as I find time to do those things I don't want to do.
So where do I start??? Well...there are going to be lots of baby steps for sure...but they are steps and as long as they are proceeding forward then they will be celebrated! Step number one...no more cheap house wine! I deserve better then that. I don't get to do this often enough...but when I am out and enjoying a little relaxing time, I am going to do it enjoying a glass of wine that tastes good! Shopping...no more talking myself out of that absolutely perfect blouse because it's not on sale. I love the thrill of the hunt...don't get me wrong. I would rather find a bargain on a clearance rack, but if I should find the perfect blouse that makes my heart skip a beat when I see it...I will buy it with out remorse. ( sorry Princess...I know retail is a dirty word...I'll beg for forgiveness on this one ). Redesigning my own home...little by little I will start to remove those things that hold no real value or meaning to me and learn to live a more clutter free life and to make those things that share my spaces a truer reflection of the person I now am...not the one that I was...nor the one I have yet to discover...but me in the here and now. I am also going to take time to prioritize all the many things that are keeping me busy and direct my attention to those that speak to my passion. Again I am reminded that its not the destination but the journey and I can choose to be at the wheel or just be a passenger. Just try to pry the keys from my hands....See you on the road way! Pinkies Up!